Not a band I listen to often. Or at all really.
Every time I hear it I go back to one night.
We're driving down the street, past a school or possibly a church sign and I was singing along. He was too. I had a sudden feeling that he wanted me to stop. So I did. I watched a building go by, the yellow street lights dimmed by the blacked windows. We parked.
We walked through that town, past shops and talked about apartments. Looking into windows of various stores, walking some more, admiring the court house. I remember asking him about one of my friends, but I did't really care about his response. I knew my view of her, and it was as if I was trying to show my self I was capable of my own thought process. We walked and walked and walked. A cool alleyway here, an interesting view of the moon there...
Why did I stop singing in the car?
I felt like I was taking something that was his.
Like I was intruding on his life.
Evidently he thought so too.
I don't think about this often but upon listening to covers by two very talented young men, I found this song and I started thinking about...everything tied to this. It's not that important to me anymore, but it pops up occasionally. And sometimes I wish I had the courage to talk to him one last time. Not about this, but about everything (except this.) I miss having a person to go to, to be able to express ideas and thoughts to. But life happens, people separate and time goes on.
Its actually kind of funny. My family and I went to WalMart today to return my sister's gift and exchange it for something else. When I got out of the car I thought about the possibility of seeing a person of interest (not to pursue, but literally someone who looked interesting.) I kept my head down but of course to my misfortune I look up and there he is. Plaid and all doing that awkward smile wave thing, where he is obviously just being polite. I hate that. So anyway my mom was like "Why was he so shy/awkward towards us?" and I basically laughed out loud. I seriously just wish that I could go and give it a better ending. Not the relationship, that wasn't too bad but the friendship. That was the ugly part.
Hate it.
-Laura
PS-Worst Part? It was my fault.
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