Uncomfortable.

 I've never been so unsure and uncomfortable about a situation before. I've been close, but not this close. I don't know if its the newness of it to me, or maybe the fact that we're both a little awkward, but I feel sick about it and I feel like it isn't right. I want to be with someone, but I don't think I mean it when I say I like him. I feel like I'm forcing myself to say that instead of "He's nice and I'm lonely." Its wrong all over and I feel horrible about it because I may or may have not lead him on to think I liked him, and that may or may have not creeped him out.

I don't know how to explain this unless you can relate to the feeling of something just isn't right. Or maybe I'm just afraid of getting into this stuff again...No I don't think so. This just isn't right.