I Didn't Go

கேएकהгодинуઆરშ(ن)

Oh great goddess,
that only in your eyes can see.

You steal great things from others,
and twist them with your ability.

You make their belongings your own,
but in the end nothing will be shown.

All that you own will fade away,
your glory and glamour will not stay.

People are seeing though your glass mask,
and you look away only to find a void

You like to think you are a philosopher,
but it doesn't take long for the others to get annoyed.

The mask is starting to crack,
and you realize that you're having an anxiety attack.

Only its happened so often people do not care,
and you are now faintly aware.

You hide your face and turn to run,
finally aware of what you've become.

But its too late and the people recognize,
that you're only a human truly known by no one.

______________________________________

-Laura

Thanksgiving

I am thankful for my sister.
I am thankful for the way she and i can sit in silence or sit and talk for hours.
I am thankful for the way that I see her in a different light now, that I don't try and make my self fit into a mold.
I am thankful that she opens my eyes to different cultures, ideas and thoughts.
I am thankful that she sees people, and knows how to react in situations
I am thankful that she doesn't judge people and that she can relate to how I feel about life at times.
I am thankful that she listens.
I am thankful that she talks.
I am thankful for everything she is.

I am thankful for God.
I am thankful for my faith in what I believe.
I am thankful for the fact that even though I have an open mind I still find myself turning to him for answers.

I am thankful for the fact that so much can change in a years time.
I am thankful that I have changed.
I am thankful that I can see now, not distracted by what I see with my eyes but what I can see and feel with my heart.
I am thankful that I learned to forgive.
I am thankful that I know no one is perfect and that life is ever changing.
I am thankful that I am learning to look at others eyes to see their hearts

I am thankful for my mom.
I am thankful of how her emotions show in her eyes
I am thankful that she is here with us
I am thankful that despite all she has been through she still pushes onward
I am thankful that she was been strong
I am thankful for her anger
I am thankful for her kindness
I am thankful also for everything she is.

I am thankful for my eldest sister.
I am thankful for her stubborn attitude
I am thankful for her love
I am thankful that through the years we have learned to see each-other as sisters
I am  thankful for that night
I am thankful also for everything she is

I am thankful I have a Dad
I am thankful that despite him not actually being here, that he tries.
I am thankful that I get to seem him at least once every 2 or 3 months
I am thankful that I still have a biological father

I am thankful for my grandmas
I am thankful that they have always been so sweet
I am thankful for the times they taught me some of the best lessons in life
I am thankful for the old toys they let me play with when I was 5
I am thankful for all their stories from when they were young
I am absolutely thankful for everything they are

I am thankful that I knew my grandpa
I am thankful that I saw him as amazing
I am thankful he had a pet squirrel and fed it Pistachios
I am thankful for the doll that he gave me that her wrote a note on the tummy of
I am thankful that I went on a walk with him before he died
I am thankful for all the memories that he has left with me

I am thankful for a lot of other things too
I am thankful for my Uncle Jeff and his beautifully chaotic family
I am thankful for all the people I knew in the past
I am thankful for life
I am thankful for all of those whom I will meet in my future
I am thankful for rain
I am thankful for love
I am thankful for everything that I have ever experienced.

Happy Holidays everyone

-Laura

Toxic Nasty

Dude. Everything that I eat that is remotely unhealthy has been tasting like toxic nasty. I suppose this is a good thing though. And my aches and pains go away when I exercise. Hmmm, dear body, are you telling me something? xD Just in time for the holidays too. haha

43.75%

On an average school day, I spend ___________% of my day at __________:

16.67% at work

29.17% at school

12.5 % doing homework

29.17 % sleeping (including naps)

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

I realize that if you actually take the time and count them up, it doesn't equal 100% (but who would sit there and do that? Really.) This is due to my failure at math (most likely) I counted up the hours I went by and everything...ah well. Its not really that important. I was trying to make a point really.

I feel like I'm wasting my life.

I spend all this time at places where I don't want to be, and I know "That to be able to get somewhere, you have to start at the bottom." or "To be able to follow your dream you need school."  I'm aware of all this, and believe me, I am the last person you would see dropping out of school.

Its just that I feel like everything is a routine. How am I living? How am I, in any way, giving use to this short amount of time on Earth to actually live and do something? The saying that is said too often but rarely understood is "Life is too short."

Just something to think about I guess.

Farewell,
Laura

The Nightmare in Ceramics

So today, I was in Ceramics and I was fine all first period and then I felt really sick. Like the kind of sick where you feel like throwing up, only not, and all you can  do is sit through it until it becomes unbearable. So you go home to be alone in your painful sickness.

On any normal day this would have been pretty bad but today I have a test in chemistry, learning some new things in Math and a presentation in Western Civ. This is bad. Very bad. I did a lot of work for that project so I really hope she doesn't take off points due to the fact that I won't be there to present...

On a lighter note, I get to spend time with my dog and kitten today. =D

Hope your day is going well, and if its not, eat some ice cream and nutella.

Farewell,
Laura

The Love of Naps

Ahhh so many things to cover >.< 

Well, I guess lately everything has been kind of crazy. A lot of school projects, more hours at work, more art projects (I separate these from my school "projects") and all this means many late night study sessions for me. 

And that means a very exhausted and stressed out Laura. 

Aaandd despite the fact I just started writing this Ima go watch Glee. 

Farewell,

Laura

You Could Be Happy